The Life Of Dave

It has been a while. Far too long in fact. A whole heap of things have happened in the last few months that I just want to get out there. FIRSTLY: Chloë and I broke up on Feb 27. We both decided it would be the best thing to do given recent events at the time. It was hard, and it still is hard. I'm doing ym best, but it's strange to think that a person who was such a HUGE part of my life isn't going to be as involved anymore, or really even wants to be.

SECONDLY: I have become heavily involved with the youth at my church now. It is such an honour to be able to speak into their lives, and thear their stories. These guys have been through so much, and it's REALLY inspiring to see them digging further into God.

THIRDLY: I am now on a relationship break for 6 months, so I can clear my head post-Chloë. I just don't think it's fair at all for me to be dragging another person through all my rebound shit.

FINALLY: I no longer work at The Foundry (uni pub) I know work in a much nicer job doing warehousing.

That is all,

Keep being awesome.

Dave out.

So, I will be spending this coming christmas with my family at the family crib...a place with one phone line, minimal cell-phone coverage at best, and no internet. You wanna know something? I'm looking forward to it, and I'm not entirely sure why.

I guess I'm really looking forward to having a much simpler christmas with just my family. For three days, it's going to be back to basics. Sharing a room with my brother, falling asleep to the sounds of the night, waking up to birdsong and (hopefully) the sun streaming through my incredibly thin curtains. I'm going to have only three analogue TV channels. I'm probably gonna catch up on some reading, and exchange stories with my grandparents, who we'll be seeing on Christmas afternoon. I'm going to play board games and cards with people who've known me my entire life, and know all my strategies well in advance.

I'm also kind of sad, this is going to be my last Christmas with my family before my little brother gets married in January. Next Christmas, everything is going to be different. My brother will probably be spending it with his new wife, and his new family. Our family will have grown, and there will be new dynamics, more presents to buy, and different games to play. This Christmas is one last hurrah, one last time as just an immediate family. After this Christmas, things will be VERY different. I know I'm supposed to embrace change, but I guess part of me thought Christmas was always gonna be the same.

While we're on the topic of Christmas, I've started thinking about some of the people I'm not going to get to spend christmas with, who I'm extremely thankful for the friendship of.

First, I have to mention an INCREDIBLY special woman who has inspired me, and supported me, and made me very feel loved and special. Chloë, you are an AMAZING woman, and I can't tell you that enough. You provide balance to myself in so many ways. I love you.

Secondly, I want to thank all of my friends who've hung out with me during my highs and lows, people I've had classes with. People who I've shared lunch and life with. You guys are all incredibly special to me, and if I could, I'd wish each and every one of you a VERY Merry Christmas. But, I'd probably run out of space in this entry, and seeing as I won't be able tio get online on Christams day, MERRY CHRISTMAS, you guys rock, and I can't wait to spend timje with you all in 2009.

I wish you all a safe and happy Holiday Season, and I can't wait to catch up with you, and swap christmas stories.

Love you guys and girls,

Dave.

I never realized just how much I love you until I had to say goodbye to you for the summer. Yes, we are still together but the days drag on and when I can't see you or touch you the time we are goin to be apart seems like an eternity. I spend hours staring at the picture I have of you on my cellphone. I love you so much. But saying that just doesn't seem to convey how strongly I feel about you. You are my calm in the storm, you are the one who listens when no-one else will. You tuck me in when I'm sick, and you comfort me when I'm upset. There's hardly a second when you're not on my mind, you never judge me, and love me with such compassion and care, you mean so very much to me, and I want to share that with the world. Chloe, I love you. You are an amazing woman with a beautiful soul, and if let me, I'd love to make you happy for the rest of your life. You always can make me smile, and I hope I can always do the same for you.

Love always,

Dave.

I was just browsing the web for some wallpaper for my iMac, and I came across this:

"Here's to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The trouble-makers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They're not fond of rules, and they have no respect for the status-quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify, or vilify them. But the one thing you can't do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do."

Reading this quote almost made me cry. It challenged me that much. Do I stand out? Am I changing the world? Do I even believe that I can? Life is short, get inspired! Who's going to notice there's something different about you today?

Makes you think.

GUY FAWKES!

Some People have been saying I don't update my blog enough....so stop complaining!
So it's been quite a while since my last update, the pictures in the last two posts are from Armageddon which IMHO was pretty freaking awesome. I had a blast! Met up with a few very cool people and generally just geeked out at all the awesome stuff. NOTE TO THOSE PLANNING TO ATTEND 2007: Bring Money! Lots! I was totally broke,and calculated there was about 200 bucks worth of stuff I wanted to buy there. Apparently, next year is gonna be even bigger, so I'm gonna start saving over the summer. LOL. Other than that, Life's been busy, still keeping up with my friend in Dunedin texting / calling almost every day now. She's having a bit of a rough time at the mo, so I'm doing all I can for her via phone, but I REALLY wanna be there to help her out if I can. So next year I'm thinking I might move to Dunedin and continue my studies at Otago University according to my buddy Brett the Japanese Program there is pretty top notch.  It's a pretty big commitment for me to move down there, but I feel very comfortable with it at this stage. I'm also working on building a MAME cabinet for +3|-| |_41R It's gonna be pretty awesome when it gets all set up. Planning on having it run just a few Classics, probably just Pacman, Galaga, and Maybe Space Invaders, but we'll see. My button configuration is pretty limited at this point unfortunately, but you never know. ; ) I'll be posting pics of progress as it gets set up. The Flat is going alright, still a few quibbles here and there, but overall it seems to be going well. Just handed in a 2000 word history essay, which I hope I did well on, as I totally bombed the last one. On top of that I have a 1500 word Japanese Culture Essay due on Friday, so It's all hands on deck academically this week. Unfortunately, I've also managed to somehow collect my third cold in the last 2 months, which isn't too pleasing, Gonna try and see a doctor sooner rather than later. It's not even really Winter yet!! Although most of the leaves are now off the trees, it's still too warm, and there haven't been any frosts yet. Went to a ball last Friday night, which was pretty cool. The Theme was Cluedo, and I went as colonel mustard, no, no photos, sorry. My good mate Owen was playing the drums with the 18 piece jazz band, which sounded awesome. It was great to bump into him, as we haven;t seen each other in a wee while, and he seems to be doing well.  Also had the chance to catch up with a few old high school friends on the Saturday night which was pretty cool. Overall, a pretty productive weekend, I think this one's gonna be pretty quiet, which is great, cos I'm absolutely shattered. NEED.MORE.SLEEP.
anyways, gotta dash, once again class calls.

So I spent the last 3 days hanging out in Pleasant Point. with a very good friend of mine. It was great to catch up with her and stuff. She's a very special friend to me, I've known her for about 6-7 years now, and I've never lost contact with her. She's smart, honest, trustworthy, and she GETS me. She actually thinks I'm kinda funny, which is nice. Oh, and she respects the geek factor, mega plus. : )

Basically, you're probably wondering why I'm not dating her.

Well, there's a few reasons. firstly, she's 3 months pregnant (not mine). Secondly, she's moving to Dunedin, which is nowhere near where I live, aka Christchurch. So yeah, it would be long distance, she'd be pregnant, and I'd need to be around a bit more.

So we're good friends.

As logical as that sounds, a part of me still wishes I could be with her, in a relationship sense. Probably due to the fact I've had a crush on her, at least in a small sense, since we first met, many many moons ago.

But my logical brain is happy with how things are.

Guess I can't complain.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you,

THE LAIR

nice huh?

Before it was a total mess, with no space at all.
I'm so proud of me and my flatmate's efforts!

/dance

Why is it that whenever I should feel the happiest that I somehow end up feeling lousy? I've just realized that I put far too much status on having friends. I always feel very very alone when I'm not around other people. Am I so pathetic that I constantly feel the need for others to validate me existence? Things are going good for me, and all I can seem to focus on is the negatives, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME!!?!?!
If I met myself, I think I;d probably kick my own ass, I'm just sick of feeling alone and unloved. I reckon most people think I'm some happy-go-lucky guy with no problems, far from it. I need someone to tell me I'm a good person, and that things will be alright, I haven't had that for so long. Fuck I'm a fucking whinger. FUCK. Seriously!

I just realized that I forgot to mention I moved into a new flat in 2007, after wanting to stay in the other flat, I decided to shift. This came down to me thinking a lot about old memories I had of that flat, quite a few weren't very pleasant. If I had stayed I felt that my head was gonna get seriously screwed around with. Guess I was right about that. One of the new guys at the old flat is now dating my ex, this would've probably messed with me up royally. Fortunately I'm in a new flat now, and things seem much better. I have a cool group of people I live with, a lot more space in the backyard, a bigger room, and THE LAIR. (expect picture shortly).

Last weekend, I got a text telling em a very good family friend had passed away. He was only 18, and he died in a quadbike race at a speedway event near where his family lives. This has taken a pretty big toll on me, but at least I know he died doing something he loved.

Life's been throwing a few curve balls at me lately, and had this happened last year, I think I would've been pretty crushed. This year though, I've dealt with most of it pretty well, and I feel this is a testament to how much I grew in 2006.

Well, class is calling again.

Dave Out.

Seriously, that's how I'm feeling right about now, I'm single again, through choice, but I reckon I might've fouled something up in the breakup process. Courses are keeping me so busy, I feel like I'm missing out on a lot of time with my friends, who I don't have classes with at all. :(

I'm slowly making new friends, but being a little shy, it's not as easy as it used to be for me. It really blows that I'm still a first year while most of the other people I know are second or third year, or almost finished. I'll get over it eventually.

New flat is going well, I'm getting on well with the crew, and the "lair" aka reclaimed garage is shaping up nicely. totally stoked about that.

Anyways, that's me, class calls.

Yes, it's true, I, Dave, am a mac-whore. I am sitting here in my buddy Brett's flat, in dunedin. Posting on another friend's Mac (thanks matt) , that I'm borrowing for the weekend. I've always berated Brett for switching from PC to mac, often referring to him as a mac-whore. When I got an ipod nano, the reverse taunts began. Now sitting here, Brett has taken a photo of me using an iBook, and is about to post it on his website. DAMMIT.
Will post about my visit to chch in the next day or soon.

Well, 007 has begun, and what a year it's been so far. I hope the new year's celebrations weren't too hard on you, and that you are ready to face the new year with the enthusiasm I now have. I spent my New Years in Nelson, with a group of friends from my church, and of course my new girlfriend as of December 26, Brydie. (Love you baby) I got to hang out with a great group of people, share a truckload of laughs, fire off my now broken spudgun, and reflect on 2006. It wasn't the best year for me, and a lot of shit went down in my life, both personally and professionally. Thanks to everyone who supported me in the tough times, I love you all. Those who shared in the good times, I'm stoked that I got to share them with all of you. :) 2007 is gonna be a year for me where I get "my shit sorted", "my ducks in a row", that kinda thing, and I hope to share this experience with you. I'm still stuck in scummy invercargill, but with the way things are going, right now, it doesn't seem so bad.

A few days ago, I found myself up around the part of town where all my old schools are located. I decided to go for a wander through. I started off with my high school. As I wandered through, there had been a few major building improvements, most notably the school library had recently received a major upgrade. The old safe haven I used to hang out in was now gone. The outside benches replaced by a sleek glass atrium, and a sizeable technology suite. The horrid green carpet inside, with early 70’s fittings was gone. I’ll never forget the old library, I spent many hours in my junior years hanging out there, escaping the bitter cold of winter, and burying myself in novels and its large Gray Larson and Asterix collections. I met some of my best friends around that place, many of whom I still keep in touch with. As I wandered across the quad, I noted that it now seemed so much smaller than I remembered it, maybe I’d just grown a little more than I thought. I left that place behind four years ago, and yet it still felt like I’d never left. I certainly don’t feel any more grown up than I did when I left, yet so much has changed. I’ve made new friends, shared a host of life experiences, and lived independently of my parents for the last three years. But now, while I’m home for the summer holidays, I feel sad. I find myself questioning where I’m headed. Certainly not in the direction I thought I would be headed when I left the hallowed halls of my high school. I guess you can never really tell what life is going to bring. I also found myself wondering what happened to some of the people who I failed to keep in touch with, were they happy? Were they married? Were they still even alive? I had absolutely no idea. If you’re reading this, and you’re one of those friends I haven’t heard from in a while, drop a comment. If you’re a friend who I keep in touch with, I want to thank you for all the joy you bring to my life, and I want to thank you for the memories I have. I went home and tried on my old school blazer, for some reason Mum decide to keep it. It still fit. For that split second I was back strolling the corridors. Hanging with my mates without a care in the world, I was free.